why

Often on days i wonder, 'why am i the way i am'. It feels very heavy inside sometimes, and at other times there is void inside, the deep vaccum sucking in every single emotion around, good or bad. And some other times, there is this muted feeling, that lets the wierdest emotion to take a pass.

I wonder sometimes
why things arent the way they should be?
why the world around isnt the way i dream about?
why do people think undoing acts?
why do two people love each other inspite of misgivings?
why sometimes they fight with each other and break away?
why sometimes in small acts, there is so much joy
and why in some big acts, there is little purity

why doesn't everyone see what i see
why do i dont see what they see
why do i feel i am the cause
and why sometimes i am the reason
why is there so much ambiguity
and why isnt the world in binaries

why do things go astray, when i say
"boy, this thing is going to be great"
and why sometimes things turn around,
where none is expected

i guess, someone already listens and loves to play
and plays opposite of what i think
this is why, this post is 'why'
questioning eternally